Mornings I try to cram in news before work. During the day I am generally reading contracts, law, and other lawyerly things. After work I try to squeeze in a little course reading (IFR), and then it's on to the BABY BOOKS. There just isn't enough time. I understand that after the birth I will have a lot more time for pleasure reading. Here's part of what I am currently trying to digest:
The Birth Partner
On Becoming Baby Wise
What to Expect When You're Expecting
HypnoBirthing
Instrument Procedures Handbook
Instrument Pilot
Wall Street Journal
New York Times
The Economist
Kiplinger
Wired
Karin has read many more birthing and baby books than I have. Some of that had to do with her training. She did work on a maternity ward during residency.
Tonight is our last session with our HypnoBirthing teacher. From now on, it's just us and our doula, into the home stretch. Actually, I think we are already in the home stretch; Karin asked me this morning to make sure all the batteries are charged in our various devices. Apparently Braxton-Hicks was rather front and center last night.
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Monday, February 25, 2008
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Baby-Dreams and Mommy Takes Up New Hobby
We are getting very close. We have passed 37 weeks. All systems appear to be "go". Some serious anticipation happening here.
Today, Karin put together a Pack'n'Play. You parents know what that is. For you non-parents, it's a play-pen looking device with multiple levels and attachments.
So, at around 2:00 PM today, I headed upstairs. There was Karin, on the floor, in the bedroom, assembling the Pack,'n'Play. In the 10+ years that I have known Karin, she has not shown the least bit of interest in assembling anything. I, on the other hand, have assembled computers, shelving, furniture, toys, networks, models... I have installed appliances, a satellite dish, paintings, pictures, shelving units... I have fixed the trash disposal, replaced parts in our cars, repaired bicycles.... You get the idea.
Today was the first time, from what I can tell, that assembly of furniture ever crossed Karin's mind. But today, when I went upstairs, and found Karin elbows-deep in a half-assembled Pack'n'Play, I asked her what she was doing. She calmly, and matter-of-factly, replied, "I'm assembling the Pack'n'Play," as though furniture assembly was her normal 2:00 PM activity. "Oh," I said, "Why are you assembling the Pack'n'Play?" "Because the baby is coming," she replied.
"Does this mean it's time to go to the hospital?" I wondered to myself. To make a long story short, it was not. Karin had just decided that she would take on furniture-assembly at this juncture in her life.
In other news, we have both had baby dreams. Since dreams are premonitions, I can now confirm that our son is extremely well behaved and looks a lot like this -terrific dancer.
Today, Karin put together a Pack'n'Play. You parents know what that is. For you non-parents, it's a play-pen looking device with multiple levels and attachments.
So, at around 2:00 PM today, I headed upstairs. There was Karin, on the floor, in the bedroom, assembling the Pack,'n'Play. In the 10+ years that I have known Karin, she has not shown the least bit of interest in assembling anything. I, on the other hand, have assembled computers, shelving, furniture, toys, networks, models... I have installed appliances, a satellite dish, paintings, pictures, shelving units... I have fixed the trash disposal, replaced parts in our cars, repaired bicycles.... You get the idea.
Today was the first time, from what I can tell, that assembly of furniture ever crossed Karin's mind. But today, when I went upstairs, and found Karin elbows-deep in a half-assembled Pack'n'Play, I asked her what she was doing. She calmly, and matter-of-factly, replied, "I'm assembling the Pack'n'Play," as though furniture assembly was her normal 2:00 PM activity. "Oh," I said, "Why are you assembling the Pack'n'Play?" "Because the baby is coming," she replied.
"Does this mean it's time to go to the hospital?" I wondered to myself. To make a long story short, it was not. Karin had just decided that she would take on furniture-assembly at this juncture in her life.
In other news, we have both had baby dreams. Since dreams are premonitions, I can now confirm that our son is extremely well behaved and looks a lot like this -terrific dancer.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Names Names Names
Baby naming is complex. Our little friend is going to have to live with whatever we encumber him with for a long time. Are there really names that lead, inevitably, to trauma? There are many places to look for names. Even the Social Security Administration provides lists.
Here are some names that have been ruled out: Zorba, Shamu, Bling Bling, Dynasty, Chimchar, Strychnine, Aloysius Snuffleupagus, Shmoolik, Uranus, Osama, Jesus (pronounced "Hey Seuss" - a very popular name here).
Here are a few that are still in the running (in no particular order): Laszlo, Charles, Sidney, Aristotle, Sebastian, Oscar, Roman, Lucas, Victor, Maxwell.
Names that have yet to be considered: Moby, Zeppelin, Henderson, Logan, Edgar, Leonardo, Hudson, Socrates.
The field is still wide open.
Here are some names that have been ruled out: Zorba, Shamu, Bling Bling, Dynasty, Chimchar, Strychnine, Aloysius Snuffleupagus, Shmoolik, Uranus, Osama, Jesus (pronounced "Hey Seuss" - a very popular name here).
Here are a few that are still in the running (in no particular order): Laszlo, Charles, Sidney, Aristotle, Sebastian, Oscar, Roman, Lucas, Victor, Maxwell.
Names that have yet to be considered: Moby, Zeppelin, Henderson, Logan, Edgar, Leonardo, Hudson, Socrates.
The field is still wide open.
Friday, February 15, 2008
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Labor and Delivery Tour
Today we went on a tour of the Labor & Delivery ward of the hospital. Karin and I, and 20 other prospective parents, met with a nurse that works on the ward. She discussed what parents typically will experience. She showed us a video about epidurals (produced by SOAP), and then showed us around. I think Karin was not overly impressed with their modest efforts to make it more comfortable than a typical hospital room.
Because we are locked into Kaiser Permanente, there is not a lot of flexibility in terms of where we go. They have a total of 2 private rooms. All of the other post-partum rooms are for 2 moms and 2 babies. When you add visitors, those rooms are crowded places.
We would prefer a private room, of course. Their policy, unfortunately, is that the 2 private rooms are given to moms that undergo cesarean birth. So our choice appears to be either we have a cesarean or we have a roommate.
A third choice is for us to pay privately to be in a birthing center that is not affiliated with Kaiser. This would mean an additional $5,000 out-of-pocket. I know, from reading the Wall Street Journal, that broaching the topic of money when one is having a child is considered by many to be contemptible. But when one adds up fees for the mohel, doula, hypnoborthing teacher, books, gear, and mommy treatments, it's tough to ignore the issue. We are hoping to have something left over after the birth so we can at least feed the little one... and possibly keep him clean.
The nurse that was showing us around seemed very nice. This is a good sign. Given how things are set up at Kaiser, it is impossible for us to actually meet the staff who will be there when we go in. This includes the obstetrician. While not ideal from a continuity-of-care standpoint, it is nice to know that they are there at all times and we will not have to page them and hope for the best when the moment of truth arrives.
We are now exactly one month from the initial due date that we were given. I think this weekend we will pack a bag that will be ready for us to take to the hospital. We will also install the car seats. And I had better catch up on the reading list that I have been given. I'm a little behind.
Because we are locked into Kaiser Permanente, there is not a lot of flexibility in terms of where we go. They have a total of 2 private rooms. All of the other post-partum rooms are for 2 moms and 2 babies. When you add visitors, those rooms are crowded places.
We would prefer a private room, of course. Their policy, unfortunately, is that the 2 private rooms are given to moms that undergo cesarean birth. So our choice appears to be either we have a cesarean or we have a roommate.
A third choice is for us to pay privately to be in a birthing center that is not affiliated with Kaiser. This would mean an additional $5,000 out-of-pocket. I know, from reading the Wall Street Journal, that broaching the topic of money when one is having a child is considered by many to be contemptible. But when one adds up fees for the mohel, doula, hypnoborthing teacher, books, gear, and mommy treatments, it's tough to ignore the issue. We are hoping to have something left over after the birth so we can at least feed the little one... and possibly keep him clean.
The nurse that was showing us around seemed very nice. This is a good sign. Given how things are set up at Kaiser, it is impossible for us to actually meet the staff who will be there when we go in. This includes the obstetrician. While not ideal from a continuity-of-care standpoint, it is nice to know that they are there at all times and we will not have to page them and hope for the best when the moment of truth arrives.
We are now exactly one month from the initial due date that we were given. I think this weekend we will pack a bag that will be ready for us to take to the hospital. We will also install the car seats. And I had better catch up on the reading list that I have been given. I'm a little behind.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
HypnoBirthing 101
Riddle: What do you get when you cross new technology with experts in a given field? Answer: A new and improved way of doing things! Right? Well, not always. For example, some professional out there thought up using formaldehyde as insulation in our homes. That didn't work out very well. Another virtuoso decided it was a good idea to put lead in paint to get it to really shine.
The Industrial Revolution convinced people that the best way for anything to be done was to find an expert, and then have that person figure out a way for man to engineer the process. For example, when I lived in Hong Kong, I was always struck by how they built parks: First they would find a beautiful, unspoiled, serene piece of property, overlooking the ocean. Then they would remove all grass, trees, and vegetation of any kind. Then they would flatten it and pave over it. Then they would try to come up with a plan to make it a good place for children to play and for adults to wander. This could involve putting down rubber to make the ground soft (like grass might have been before they paved it) and putting up structures to shade people (like trees might have done before they were cut down). The whole concept seemed bizarre to me at the time. Why would anyone want to destroy a beautiful and natural landscape when it could just be modified for the kiddies to play? It was the experts of course. It was men in suits in the government, and their contractors, that decided how parks should be created. "Let's start by getting rid of all this vegetation, Stan. Then we'll be able to see our canvas."
The modern birthing process has evolved in a similar way. A group of medical experts (hospital administrators, doctors, etc.) decided that the best way for women to give birth was to put them in a hospital room and to develop drugs and surgery that would enable said experts to get to their golf games on time. Here's something you probably didn't know: Cesarean births go up markedly on Friday afternoons. The trend is even stronger if it's a long weekend. And you can forget about a conventional birth for days preceding your OB's ski holiday in Utah.
Birth has evolved to suit doctors and hospitals and administrators and insurance companies. Nature's role has been minimized. Women are taught, via movies and television, that birth is painful and that doctors are there to professionally and systematically control the process so that the baby is popped out on schedule and in an orderly, and technologically-correct, fashion. Doctors, on the other hand, are taught that using machines and drugs and surgery is not only high-tech and fun, but it also lives up to the standard of care in the community, avoids tort claims, and minimizes malpractice insurance premiums and deductibles. Win-win-win, right?
Doctors that work in hospitals traditionally treat people who have medical problems. Sometimes the patients have broken bones or missing limbs or perhaps it's just some disgusting disease that no one wants to be around. But that's what hospitals are set up for. So it's a bit of a stretch to have perfectly healthy women and perfectly healthy utero-dwellers suddenly occupying beds in such a place. An expert (doctor) would argue that it's a good idea to do all this birthing stuff in a place built for sick people in case there are complications. Well, in that case, it's also a good idea for college students who binge drink to do so in a hospital. But I hear frat houses are even more popular than hospitals for getting naked and hazing people in drunken stupors.
Woman have been giving birth for quite a few years now. They were, in fact, giving birth even before men wore suits. Now, I'm not suggesting that men in suits have done nothing for birth. Men in suits developed hygiene, for example. Hygiene is a wonderful invention. It has saved countless lives. It has made it possible for us all to live healthier, longer, more securely. And it has improved our sex lives immeasurably.
I am not certainly not an expert on HypnoBirthing. In fact, I had never heard of it 2 weeks ago. But after 2 sessions with Carol, our HypnoBirthing teacher, and after doing some reading and watching videos (you wouldn't believe what we have seen), I am brainwashed. I mean, I am convinced: The medical establishment has made a mess out of what has become de rigeur in hospital birthing.
This isn't to say that we are not going to have a hospital birth. We are going to be in the hospital, replete with doctors and nurses and contraction-inducing drugs and epidurals and forceps and machines that monitor everything in the room that moves, gives off heat, or conducts electricity. But we are going to have the baby in accordance with what is best for Karin and our baby... and not necessarily what is best for the OB's reservation at the La Jolla Beach and Tennis Club. I have nothing at all against the La Jolla Beach and Tennis Club but why would we want that to have any influence over how a doctor determines the best course of action for Karin and our baby? And why would we want to follow what learned experts in the late 19th century dreamed up to be the basis of our birthing process?
The Industrial Revolution convinced people that the best way for anything to be done was to find an expert, and then have that person figure out a way for man to engineer the process. For example, when I lived in Hong Kong, I was always struck by how they built parks: First they would find a beautiful, unspoiled, serene piece of property, overlooking the ocean. Then they would remove all grass, trees, and vegetation of any kind. Then they would flatten it and pave over it. Then they would try to come up with a plan to make it a good place for children to play and for adults to wander. This could involve putting down rubber to make the ground soft (like grass might have been before they paved it) and putting up structures to shade people (like trees might have done before they were cut down). The whole concept seemed bizarre to me at the time. Why would anyone want to destroy a beautiful and natural landscape when it could just be modified for the kiddies to play? It was the experts of course. It was men in suits in the government, and their contractors, that decided how parks should be created. "Let's start by getting rid of all this vegetation, Stan. Then we'll be able to see our canvas."
The modern birthing process has evolved in a similar way. A group of medical experts (hospital administrators, doctors, etc.) decided that the best way for women to give birth was to put them in a hospital room and to develop drugs and surgery that would enable said experts to get to their golf games on time. Here's something you probably didn't know: Cesarean births go up markedly on Friday afternoons. The trend is even stronger if it's a long weekend. And you can forget about a conventional birth for days preceding your OB's ski holiday in Utah.
Birth has evolved to suit doctors and hospitals and administrators and insurance companies. Nature's role has been minimized. Women are taught, via movies and television, that birth is painful and that doctors are there to professionally and systematically control the process so that the baby is popped out on schedule and in an orderly, and technologically-correct, fashion. Doctors, on the other hand, are taught that using machines and drugs and surgery is not only high-tech and fun, but it also lives up to the standard of care in the community, avoids tort claims, and minimizes malpractice insurance premiums and deductibles. Win-win-win, right?
Doctors that work in hospitals traditionally treat people who have medical problems. Sometimes the patients have broken bones or missing limbs or perhaps it's just some disgusting disease that no one wants to be around. But that's what hospitals are set up for. So it's a bit of a stretch to have perfectly healthy women and perfectly healthy utero-dwellers suddenly occupying beds in such a place. An expert (doctor) would argue that it's a good idea to do all this birthing stuff in a place built for sick people in case there are complications. Well, in that case, it's also a good idea for college students who binge drink to do so in a hospital. But I hear frat houses are even more popular than hospitals for getting naked and hazing people in drunken stupors.
Woman have been giving birth for quite a few years now. They were, in fact, giving birth even before men wore suits. Now, I'm not suggesting that men in suits have done nothing for birth. Men in suits developed hygiene, for example. Hygiene is a wonderful invention. It has saved countless lives. It has made it possible for us all to live healthier, longer, more securely. And it has improved our sex lives immeasurably.
I am not certainly not an expert on HypnoBirthing. In fact, I had never heard of it 2 weeks ago. But after 2 sessions with Carol, our HypnoBirthing teacher, and after doing some reading and watching videos (you wouldn't believe what we have seen), I am brainwashed. I mean, I am convinced: The medical establishment has made a mess out of what has become de rigeur in hospital birthing.
This isn't to say that we are not going to have a hospital birth. We are going to be in the hospital, replete with doctors and nurses and contraction-inducing drugs and epidurals and forceps and machines that monitor everything in the room that moves, gives off heat, or conducts electricity. But we are going to have the baby in accordance with what is best for Karin and our baby... and not necessarily what is best for the OB's reservation at the La Jolla Beach and Tennis Club. I have nothing at all against the La Jolla Beach and Tennis Club but why would we want that to have any influence over how a doctor determines the best course of action for Karin and our baby? And why would we want to follow what learned experts in the late 19th century dreamed up to be the basis of our birthing process?
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Our First Hypno-Birthing Class
In 45 minutes we shall begin our first hypno-birthing class. I have no idea what to expect, other than we will be eating dinner on the early side.
The baby has been really active recently. He is often kicking, punching, or doing elaborate jumping-jack-like maneuvers. He also changes position on a regular basis. Karin is constantly reporting abrupt movements.
To be continued...
The baby has been really active recently. He is often kicking, punching, or doing elaborate jumping-jack-like maneuvers. He also changes position on a regular basis. Karin is constantly reporting abrupt movements.
To be continued...
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